Juste sublime du premier au dernier mot
My ex Brother-in-Law's shit record collection
Jazz funk, soul, disco, bollocks. 50 discs 12" & LP
You are bidding on a collection of 50 (approx) 12" singles and LPs of crap music.
My sister found these in her attic last weekend, where they has been sat gathering dust for the last couple of decades. They used to belong to her ex-husband, who is one of the biggest arseholes ever to draw breath. I never liked the wanker, and based my initial antipathy towards him on his taste in music. Not to put too fine a point on it, he was that most contemptible form of pond life, a Jazz Funker. This meant that as well as shit taste in music, he had appalling taste in clothes too. Pringle jumpers, pleated Farrahs, shoes that looked like pasties, white socks, revolting shirts and a comical wedge-cut hairdon't. Add to this 80s fashion horrorshow a Ford Capri and Super Mario-style moustache underlining his bulbous nose, and you get an object lesson in twatdom. No wonder Northern Soul fans (and everyone else) treated the Jazz Funk fans with sneering comntempt.
I couldn't comprehend what on earth my usually sensible sister could possibly see in the pillock. In vain I pleaded with her to send him packing. My argument that his hankering for Earth Wind & Fire records and attendance at soul weekenders made him a poor choice of mate was waved away as the rantings of a callow youth. She felt my reasoning was unsound.
Reader, she married him.
He made her life miserable for a few years with his moping, moody belligerence (and playing horrendous records like these). He told her lies and generally behaved like a platinum c*nt. Then he dumped her for his mistress when my sister was four months pregnant.
It's now nearly 20 years later and I would still like to take a meat tenderizer to his face. But his most horrendous crime, worse than wiring up my granny's shower so it was electrically live, worse even than his infidelity or the awful way he treated my sister, was the fact that he actually liked the abomination known as Jazz Funk. Here is the evidence. What a bastard.
Well, I suppose I'd better tell you what's for sale, though why you would actually want to own this dreck is beyond me. It's basically music for people who have a deep-seated hatred of music and want to inflict their pain on the world. But here goes nothing.
First the 12" singles.
ARTISTABLabelNoCommentYearCondition (visual)
Beggar & Co(Somebody) Help me outb/wRising SunEnsignENYT2011981VG++
Bob JamesSign of the timesb/wWestchester Lady ; Tappan ZeeCBS16081981VG
Central LineNature Boy (full version)b/wNature Boy (83 mix) ; You've said enoughMercuryMERX131PS1983VG++
ChangeSearchingb/wAngel in my pocketWEAK79156Company bag1980VG+, small WOL
Chi Lites feat Gene RecordHave you seen herb/wSuper mad (about you baby)20th Centry Fox24811980NM
David JosephYou can't hide (your love from me)b/wYou can't hide (acapella/Instr)Island121S101PS1983NM
Debra LawsOn my ownb/wLong as we're togetherElektra125291981VG++
Eddy GrantDo you feel my loveb/wSymphony for Michael, opus 2Ensign4512Company Bag1980VG++
Eddy GrantCan't get enough of youb/wNeighbour Neighbour ; Time WarpEnsignENYT207Company bag1981Ex
Fantastic FourBring Your own Funk (BYOF)b/wSexy lady (remix)AtlanticLV141978NM
Galaxy feat Phil FearonDancing Tight (dancemix)b/wDancing Tight (instr)Ensign12ENY501Co bag1983Ex
Gap BandBurn Rubber on Me (Why you wanna hurt me)b/wNothin' Comes to SleepersMercuryMERX52PS1980VG+
HeatwaveGangsters of the grooveb/wSomeone Like youGTOGT13 2851980Ex
Johnny BristolLove no longer has a hold on meb/wTil I See you againAriola HansaAHAD5671980VG++
Kid Creole & CoconutsI'm a wonderful thing (baby)b/wTable manners (remix)ZE12WIP 6756PS1982VG++
Level 42Love Games (full length ver)b/wForty twoPolydorPOSPX2341981VG+
Light of the WorldTime (remix)b/wI'm So happyMercuryMERX64PS 1980VG++
Light of the WorldI shot the sheriff (ext mix)b/wPainted Lady; A new soft songEnsign4612Co Bag1980VG+ small WOL
Love Unlimited OrchestraLift your voice and say (united we can in peace live today)b/wMy FantasiesUnlimited GoldULGA 13 14961981VG++
LynxSo This is Romanceb/wSo This is Romance (Rio mix)Chrysalis2546PS1981VG-
MachineThere but for the grace of God go Ib/wGet your body readyRCAPC1456
Co bag1979VG++
Melba MooreLove's comin' at yab/wLet's go back to lovin' ; Love's comin' at ya (instr)EMI America1461982NM
OdesseyInside Outb/wlove's AlrightRCA2661982Ex
Patrice RushenNever gonna give you up (won't let you be)b/wDon't blame meElektra124941980VG+
Players AssociationTurn the music up (remixed disco ver)b/wGoin to the disco (remixed disco vVanguardVSL5011PS1979VG+
Roberta FlackDon't make me wait too longb/wGod Don't like uglyAtlanticK115551979NM
SeawindWhat cha doin'b/wI need your loveA&M75751980Ex
ShakatakBrazilian Dawn b/wYou Never KnowPolydorPOSPX2821981VG
ShalamarDead Giveaway (ext ver)b/wI don't wanna be the last to knowSolarE9189TPS1983Ex
Sharon ReddNever Give you upb/wBeat the Street (instr & vocal)Prelude13 27551982Ex
Sugarhill GangRappers Delight (long version)b/wRappers Delight (short version)SugarhillSHL1011979VG+
Yarborough & PeoplesDon't stop the musicb/wYou're My songMercuryMERX531980VG+
Unlimited TouchI hear music in the streetsb/wIn the middlePreludePRL D 6051980VG+
FantasyYou're too lateb/wYou're too late (instr)Pavillion4z8 64081980VG+
Kid Creole & CoconutsAnnie I'm not your daddyb/wYou had no intentionIsland6801PS1982VG+
MFSBMysteries of the worldb/wManhattan SkylineCBS TSOP95011980VG++
Kool & the GangLet's go dancin'b/wStand up and singDe LiteDEX9PS1981Ex
Third WorldDancing on the floor (hooked on love)b/wWho gave you (Jah Rastafari)CBS12141981VG+
Sharon ReddCan you handle itb/wLeaving you is easier said than doneEpic9572 Cobag1980VG++
ShakatakDark is the nightb/wI lose myselfPolydorPOPSX 595PS1983VG+
The WhispersIt's a love thingb/wGirl I need youSolarSOT 16WOL1980VG++
Donald ByrdLove has come aroundb/wloving youElektra125591978VG+
Roberta Flack feat Donny HathawayBack together againb/wOnly heaven can waitAtlantic114811979VG++
Now the LPs
ARTISTTITLELabelNoYearSleeveDiscComment
LinxIntuitionChrysalis13321981No sleevVG
Level 42World MachinePolydorPOLH 251985VG++Extwo copies!
Earth Wind & FireRaiseCBS852721981ExVG
Odysseyhang togetherRCA135261980VG++VG+
SummerFlying HomeTouchstoneBBT 1131979VG++Ex
Earth Wind & FireI AmCBS860841979VG++VG+
Earth Wind & FireBest of vol 1CBS832841978VG++
VG++
I mean, Shakatak for fucks sake. What a prick. And surely he must have realised that buying anything by Shalimar would open him up to ridicule. Even those bands' mothers couldn't bear to listen to that stuff. I know I couldn't. None of this is play graded, only visually. I just could not bring myself to dirty my stylus with this bollocks.
Boring stuff: - I grade conservatively, particularly when I don't like the records. Don't ask me to split this lot. You buy it, you buy all of it and pay the shipping. I'm not keeping it in my house any longer than strictly neccessary. For the same reason, no returns. I don't want it back. Shipping in UK is £15 because the weight is approx 10kg . I'm willing to ship overseas at cost, but it's likely to be expensive (maybe £45 in europe) and frankly this crap isn't worth the stamps. If you want to collect from Croydon, that's OK but I will look at you with a contemptuous sneer as you stand in my doorway, proving by your purchase that you are tone deaf and tasteless.
Good luck, and God help you for liking this drivel.
Enorme ! J'ai évidemment pas tout saisi, mais c'est jalonné de pics, que dis-je, de véritables lances envers ce monsieur ! Et même envers des acheteurs potentiels. 
